


9/7/1999

by GretchenSinister



Series: The Doors of Perception and Bonus Material [15]
Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:48:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23437195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GretchenSinister/pseuds/GretchenSinister
Summary: (I’m never letting this AU go! I’m taking everyone into it!)
Relationships: Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie, The Beast/Enoch (Over the Garden Wall)
Series: The Doors of Perception and Bonus Material [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1587967
Kudos: 8
Collections: Blacksand Short Fics





	9/7/1999

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Tumblr on 8/11/2015.
> 
> This is a "DVD Extra" for the fic The Doors of Perception. Because it involves a crossover, it should be considered optionally canonical with the main fic.

“You’ll never guess who’s still alive!” Sandy leaned out of the door of the computer room and beckoned Kozzy over from his magazine (glancing at the cover, Sandy saw it was one of the more ridiculous ones, he was pretty sure one of the featured articles was titled “How to Raise a Mensa Horse,” and given Onyx’s current talents and personality, it was probably important to interrupt Kozzy anyway).

Kozzy, for his part, left his reading at once and went to join Sandy in the den. Since they had gotten an internet connection, Sandy had been tying up their phone lines with endless searches for people he–and sometimes they–had known, back in the ‘60s. All of Kozzy’s connections to the Haight had been severed in one devastating blow, followed by twenty-five years of living a truly extraordinary Armani-suited lie, before he finally managed to get back to Sandy, so he didn’t have the depth of connection Sandy did with some of the people he was looking for. But he’d give up the phone forever for the sake of the happiness on Sandy’s face when he found an old friend in the land of the living.

When Sandy had talked to him about just how many people he had known had died–and died horribly–the disturbing way Kozmotis Pitchiner had simply been _unaware_ was the least chilling thing about it. So he wanted nothing but life for Sandy, now.

“You know I don’t like to guess,” Kozzy said. “I don’t want to guess wrong and spoil the mood.”

“Come over here, then,” Sandy said.

Kozzy leaned against the computer desk, long legs in black jeans stretched out in front of him.

“Okay, I found _two_ people this time, and you might remember both of them! You remember that guy who came to your birthday party wearing antlers and generally not giving a shit about whether they stabbed anyone? Even when said antlers were nearly instrumental in causing a grease fire?”

“Yes!” Kozzy turned to give more attention to the monitor, but Sandy covered it with a random piece of paper. “I _do_ remember him. He sang along to all the records like they were about impending doom, and we knew him because you had refused to be his trip guide. We called him Beast.”

“Yeah, and I didn’t even turn _you_ away,” Sandy said with a wink. “Anyway, he’s still alive, _after_ a heroin addiction–black tar, specifically, and _after_ using it gave him necrotizing faciitis. He became…an _opera singer_ of all things!”

“How did you find out all this?” Kozzy asked, pulling at the paper on the monitor. Sandy let it go, to present a wall of white text on an extremely busy background of brown tree branches over a black sky full of twinkling white stars.

“It’s a fan biography.”

Kozzy peered closely at the screen. Did he really need reading glasses finally, or was the design just terrible?

“The amazing thing is, too,” Sandy said, “That I just didn’t find him on this page. You remember Enoch? He hired Tooth to alter some clothes for him because he saw what she could do for someone as big as North, really friendly–”

“And an amazing fringed vest. Gave a lot of fresh vegetables away. Yes, I remember.”

“Well, behind a whole lot of euphemisms, he and Beast are living as a couple in upstate New York!”

Kozzy turned away from the monitor just as he was getting a hang of the horrible font. “What.”

“I know! I never would have guessed, not in a million years. Good for them.”

“I guess it’s not stranger than my story,” Kozzy said, turning back to the “Fan Domain of —– ———”

“HOLD IT!” Kozzy slammed his hand down on the desk, then broke out into slightly hysterical giggles. “THAT’S his real name? I met him. I fucking _met him_ at a black tie event. God–we all thought the ‘entertainment’ was so beneath us, we were horrible, thinking like that in general, of course, but we were meeting world-class opera singers, even! I didn’t recognize him without the antlers and so much less hair, and I barely noticed…I think he recognized me, though. Despite my short hair and suit and…despite Stella. Unless he glared that way at everyone.”

“There’s a good possibility of that,” Sandy pointed out, and Kozzy smiled at him in thanks. He’d rather not get lost in his past tonight. 

Sandy smiled. “So, you want me to try to recreate your first-ever birthday party this year?”

Kozzy smiled back. “I’d rather you just make me a fan page letting everyone know I’m not dead.”

**Author's Note:**

> Tags and Comments from Tumblr:
> 
> #hippie aus are all I have to offer#DOES NOT OVERLAP WITH BLUTRUNST
> 
> incurablenecromantic reblogged this from gretchensinister and added:  
> Oh my God.Oh my God. #this is adorable #had to get up and pace around a little #to make it last #i'm just glad that the beast managed to have a successful opera career after heroin and necrotizing fasciitis #that takes talent #and i'm glad that the beast is a complete dick in every single incarnation #it just wouldn't be right otherwise #enoch babe you are too good for this sinful weirdo #this is off the goddamn chain they would make the worst hippies ever let's be real #oh this fab i'm going to read it six or eight more times! #i am pretty sure that 'you'll never guess who's still alive' has been said about this version of the beast many many times #and definitely with less enthusiasm than sandy speaks it


End file.
